Our language has a profound impact on our thoughts and beliefs. Words are powerful. They can create or destroy; increase confidence or insecurity. Some of the common language we use when it comes to birth and babies is disempowering to mothers.
Parents are often presented with two options when it comes to raising their kids, and neither of them are very appealing...
Some women come out of the labor room with unexpected negative emotions. They can range from guilt... to fear... to rage... to hurt... to anguish. These mothers need our support so they can bring out the strong, confident mama that's inside them. Dismissing their feelings will not help those feelings magically disappear. Insensitive words only make things harder for her. It can be uncomfortable being with someone who is grieving. To be blunt, this is not about the comfort of others; it is about supporting mothers so they can do the best job for themselves and their babies. Mothers deserve this, and babies deserve this.
Here are some common pitfalls to avoid.
My eldest is about to turn 13, the age Facebook determines is mature enough to participate in their chaotically connecting community. I can no longer hide behind their rules for disallowing him access, so now I am working on preparing him.
This terrifying video has shown up on my newsfeed. Contrived or not, this was something I wanted to discuss with my kids. I sat down with my two older boys (the almost 13-year-old and the 9.5-year-old) and we watched this together. They immediately caught on to the problems.
Why did all three girls know they had to hide their activities from their parents? Because, on some level, they knew what they were doing was inherently dangerous and/or wrong. Or they just didn't trust their parents' rules and feared getting in trouble. Either way, the outcome could have been disastrous.
My boys and I made some promises to each other. We worked together to come up with this list. These promises have a direct impact on the social media aspect of life, but also serve our family as a foundation for living and working together. This is our covenant:
Melissa and Ellen are birth doulas, childbirth educators, placenta encapsulation specialists, and Parent Effectiveness Training instructors serving the Denver, CO area. They are passionate about pregnancy, birth, baby care, and parenting. They bring over twenty years of combined experience to their premium childbirth classes, doula support, parenting classes, and placenta encapsulation services in the metro Denver area.